I think one thing you can do to help your friends who are depressed is to reach out to them not in the spirit of helping, but in the spirit of liking them and wanting their company. “I’m here to help if you ever need me” is good to know, but hard to act on, especially when you’re in a dark place. Specific, ongoing, pleasure-based invitations are much easier to absorb. “I’m here. Let’s go to the movies. Or stay in and order takeout and watch some dumb TV.” “I’m having a party, it would be really great if you could come for a little while.” Ask them for help with things you know they are good at and like doing, so there is reciprocity and a way for them to contribute. “Will you come over Sunday and help me clear my closet of unfashionable and unflattering items? I trust your eye.” “Will you read this story I wrote and help me fix the dialogue?” “Want to make dinner together? You chop, I’ll assemble.” “I am going glasses shopping and I need another set of eyes.” Remind yourself why you like this person, and in the process, remind them that they are likable and worth your time and interest.
Talk to the parts of the person that aren’t being eaten by the depression. Make it as easy as possible to make and keep plans, if you have the emotional resources to be the initiator and to meet your friends a little more than halfway. If the person turns down a bunch of invitations in a row because (presumably) they don’t have the energy to be social, respect their autonomy by giving it a month or two and then try again. Keep the invitations simple; “Any chance we could have breakfast Saturday?” > “ARE YOU AVOIDING ME BECAUSE YOU’RE DEPRESSED OR BECAUSE YOU HATE ME I AM ONLY TRYING TO HELP YOU.” “I miss you and I want to see you” > “I’m worried about you.” A depressed person is going to have a shame spiral about how their shame is making them avoid you and how that’s giving them more shame, which is making them avoid you no matter what you do. No need for you to call attention to it. Just keep asking. “I want to see you” “Let’s do this thing.” “If you are feeling low, I understand, and I don’t want to impose on you, but I miss your face. Please come have coffee with me.” “Apology accepted. ApologIES accepted. So. Gelato and Outlander?”
Your mother did not raise you with a wolf in your chest so you could howl over losing a man.
Imagine Harry and Ginny a few months into their marriage and they’re so happy and in love and then one day they go shopping for food and household items and Harry just casually grabs certain items before Ginny hisses at him to "Check the prices, Harry, God! That bed set is far too expensive, we’re not going to have anything left to get the food with!" And Harry starts to laugh and say "We don’t have to worry about -" and then he stops and he and Ginny look at each other. And Harry realizes that she’s grown up having to measure out all her money and decide what she can and cannot have for a certain week or month or year. And Ginny realizes that she is actually no longer obligated to worry about money ever again.
Imagine Harry and Ginny eating dinner together and Ginny’s telling him about certain meals her mum made and teasing him about how he wolfs everything down and "Honestly Harry, you’re worse than Ron!" and Harry retorts laughingly "well old habits die hard, I had to fight Dudley for meals all the time, you at least knew you were going to eat every day!" And Ginny’s grin starts to fade and she asks "You…you didn’t get to eat everyday?" And Harry realizes what he said and he changes the subject quickly and Ginny looks at the plates in front of him and resists the urge to pile on some more potatoes. And the next day Vernon Dursley’s car is egged.
Imagine Harry and Ginny both suffering from night terrors and PTSD and agreeing that maybe going to that therapist Hermione recommended isn’t such a bad idea, and that’s how Thursday night became Therapy Night when they go out to dinner or to the pub after each session and agree that they need to talk to some Healers about introducing these sessions since therapy is still widely seen as muggle nonsense in the wizarding world.
And Ginny murmurs over her fire whiskey that sometimes she can still hear Tom Riddle murmuring in her ear, and Harry whispers that he dreams about running after his mother and father and Sirius and Remus as they disappear behind the Veil in the Department of Mysteries and he doesn’t know if he wakes from terror or regret about not making it through. And they go back home and hold each other closer that night and both wake up with raging hangovers.
I’m working on something with Carolina and 479er and is there anyone out there with knowledge of Halo, Pelicans, being a pilot, preferably (but not necessarily) all, that would not mind reading over some things when I finish it up probably later tonight and telling me how little sense it makes and how to make it not laughably awkward?
My usual alternative is to just hand wave all of that stuff aside and focus on dialogue but I’m trying to do the whole description of actions rather than thinking verbs thing and, well, when you’re in an aircraft and a pilot and copilot, a lot of your actions are going to be grounded in the plane and also flying the plane. And also general Pelican malfunctions and so on. Basically I need a Halo and (fictional or real) aviation savvy beta reader, I guess.
Some question marks for the ability to answer, or just send me an ask if this seems like something you’d be interested in helping me with???
staygold-kanerboy asked: Yay prompts!! Might I ask for 18. "My house, from here." with Tex and/or Carolina? :) (Can be AU or in-universe or whatever makes you happiest.)
“Hey,” Connie says, kneeing Wyoming in the shoulder as she stands atop the pile of Freelancers, victorious. She points at Carolina, standing by the door with a hand over her mouth and trying not to collapse in laughter at Maine’s unconscious form at the bottom of the heap of men who thought little new Connie would be an easy sparring partner. “I can see my house from here.” Connie puts her hand up like she’s shielding her eyes from a constant sun and squints at Carolina, who admits defeat as she leans against the door frame, barely catching her breath between laughs.
Nem: “You are soft as glass and I’m a gentle man”, for Wash/CT
Towards the end of “us”, he started feeling like he was looking at her through a window. As she shut herself in behind “choose a side”, and “wake up”, and “call me CT”, he could see her standing in front of him, and he could see the wall she was putting up, and it looked like a window into another universe.
Surely, soon, it would open up again and there would be Connie, his Connie, the one he knows, pushing him into a supply closet and laughing when her shirt gets stuck on her head. Soon he wouldn’t feel like he was looking at her slanted, like the light from her skin was coming in differently, like in high school science class when they learned about diffraction. Surely, soon, she’d open the window.
He tried knocking, once, tentatively, and she nearly threw her helmet at him. He thought he saw the glass crack, something in her voice at a frequency that caused a spiderweb pattern in front of him. But instead of seeing clearly, she just became more obscured as it reflected the cracks in itself, and she was standing in front of him and so far away at the same time. He thought about reaching out and pushing until the pieces between them shattered, but now he didn’t know if Connie would be on the other side when everything between them fell.
The day after she left he broke a glass in the dining hall. It was so easy, then. It started to fall and all he did was not catch it, and it shattered into tiny shards he was never quite sure got cleaned up properly. Under armored boots, it didn’t really matter.
Carolina: You’re kidding.
Grey: No silly! I’m Doctor Grey! Ha. Dad joke!
it’s funny because Carolina’s whole relationship with her dad was a joke.
What’s the difference between america and yogurt?
If u leave yogurt alone for 200 years it will develop a culture
this was like the sickest burn I’ve ever seen
OHHH my god but imagine an au where York’s like “But I can’t trust you.” an au where north’s got two sniper rifles aimed at tex before south rolls in with a missile pod like “Sup losers!”
An AU where for whatever reason, Tex ends up befriending Carolina and South instead of north and york and they’re the team that sends that whole damn ship straight to hell.
#south and tex#SOUTH AND TEX!#TOGETHER!!!#MY DISASTER GIRLS WREAKING HAVOC!!!#tex tells carolina about the director’s crimes instead of york#because she has the right to fucking know.#with north and york it’s not about what they’re fighting against#but what they’re fighting for#they haven’t got any problems with tex personally#but the moment the director tells them she’s after delta and theta#they shoot to kill#carolina still wins ofc#still leaves him with a concussion to fly off and find tex#but this time she keeps the lighter.