“Explain to me again why we need them,” Carolina said with a sigh.
“Fuck if I know,” Tucker said with a shrug. “The orange one drives shit, but he’s also allergic to doing things. Like, doing anything. The maroon one explains shit until no one actually cares what he’s talking about. Their…
The tag #i want to be able to write these characters better
Does not jive when your story has the sentence:
“But every time we go on a mission with a freelancer, we almost die anyway. So it’s die now and at peace, or die later doing work.”
Seriously it’s so Grif it hurts. Please write more red team buffoonery.
Grif is always the one I feel I have the least amount of grip on, so thank you :)
“You want a physicist to speak at your funeral. You want the physicist to talk to your grieving family about the conservation of energy, so they will understand that your energy has not died. You want the physicist to remind your sobbing mother about the first law of thermodynamics; that no energy gets created in the universe, and none is destroyed. You want your mother to know that all your energy, every vibration, every Btu of heat, every wave of every particle that was her beloved child remains with her in this world. You want the physicist to tell your weeping father that amid energies of the cosmos, you gave as good as you got.
And at one point you’d hope that the physicist would step down from the pulpit and walk to your brokenhearted spouse there in the pew and tell him that all the photons that ever bounced off your face, all the particles whose paths were interrupted by your smile, by the touch of your hair, hundreds of trillions of particles, have raced off like children, their ways forever changed by you. And as your widow rocks in the arms of a loving family, may the physicist let her know that all the photons that bounced from you were gathered in the particle detectors that are her eyes, that those photons created within her constellations of electromagnetically charged neurons whose energy will go on forever.
And the physicist will remind the congregation of how much of all our energy is given off as heat. There may be a few fanning themselves with their programs as he says it. And he will tell them that the warmth that flowed through you in life is still here, still part of all that we are, even as we who mourn continue the heat of our own lives.
And you’ll want the physicist to explain to those who loved you that they need not have faith; indeed, they should not have faith. Let them know that they can measure, that scientists have measured precisely the conservation of energy and found it accurate, verifiable and consistent across space and time. You can hope your family will examine the evidence and satisfy themselves that the science is sound and that they’ll be comforted to know your energy’s still around. According to the law of the conservation of energy, not a bit of you is gone; you’re just less orderly. Amen.”—
“I am eternally, devastatingly romantic, and I thought people would see it because ‘romantic’ doesn’t mean ‘sugary.’ It’s dark and tormented — the furor of passion, the despair of an idealism that you can’t attain.”—Catherine Breillat (via my-dark-star)
“A mermaid found a swimming lad,
Picked him for her own,
Pressed her body to his body,
Laughed; and plunging down
Forgot in cruel happiness
That even lovers drown.”—William Butler Yeats (via watchingtrainsgoby)
My day has been a series of really high ups and really low downs.
Seriously. “Yay, someone likes my art!”
"Oh shit, my car is no longer at the repair garage because the insurance took it to be totaled but my licence plates are still on there."
"Yay, someone likes my art! Friends! Sherlock!"
"<insert parents being parents. take into account that I haven’t spent this much time at home in the past three years. proceed to tear out my hair>"
Now I will go dance. Soon. Soon there will be dancing and lack of worry and then I will come back home to tumblr and art and drawings and logic and happy or so help me god/diety/whatever, I will end the life of some unsuspecting inanimate object. I will smother a pillow with another pillow until my brain makes sense again and doesn’t hurt.
Or maybe I’ll just watch random RvB episodes, I don’t know.
“Explain to me again why we need them,” Carolina said with a sigh.
“Fuck if I know,” Tucker said with a shrug. “The orange one drives shit, but he’s also allergic to doing things. Like, doing anything. The maroon one explains shit until no one actually cares what he’s talking about. Their…
You know I don’t think I’ve told you within the last week that your fics are perfect
<3 Thank you for the inspiration for this, like, weeks ago. :D (sorry it took so long)
I swear Carolina has a bottomless pit of patience for these idiots.
They were all maniacs, really, driven by one man’s hopeless fervor, and the AI proved it. How could they not have seen? Long before armor-sheering bullets clicked into the pistols in white-armored hands, the forges had been heating up, the Director deciding that whatever hot-coal ghost tortured him should haunt them all too-
CT thought all of this with her mask hiding her face. The Director was giving a speech in front of them all, but it didn’t really matter. She’d heard a lot of talks in her time about discipline and diligence and quickness in battle. She was good at them too, except for those few moments where she couldn’t keep the crackling out of her voice because she wanted to be on the board, and then Wash had to be so, so whatever he was, he had to call her Connie-
"Explain to me again why we need them," Carolina said with a sigh.
"Fuck if I know," Tucker said with a shrug. "The orange one drives shit, but he’s also allergic to doing things. Like, doing anything. The maroon one explains shit until no one actually cares what he’s talking about. Their Sergeant is-"
"-I like Sarge-" Caboose butted in.
"No one cares. Their Sergeant mostly yells at the other two to do more work, but we all know how well that goes over.”
"That is a gross misrepresentation of our team," Simmons said at the same time as Sarge let out a "that is incredibly accurate."
"What about the brown one? Lopez?" Carolina asked with a sigh.
"Lopez doesn’t even speak English," Tucker supplied. "He can fix things, though."
"Um, excuse me, Agent Carolina…sir?" Simmons said carefully to the sound of a groan from Grif. "Don’t we get to defend ourselves?"
"No," she said briskly.
"Why do we want to be needed anyway?" Grif asked.
"Because if we’re not needed, she’s going to kill us," Simmons explained patiently.
"But every time we go on a mission with a freelancer, we almost die anyway. So it’s die now and at peace, or die later doing work.”
Simmons stared at him in stunned disbelief. He considered saying something but his brain couldn’t decide between I don’t understand how you’ve survived this long and are you fucking kidding me?
"What?" Grif eventually asked. "Besides. Why would she kill us? Who’re we going to tell, the waterfall? It’s not like we have contact with anyone, we haven’t even spoken with Command in months."
"Shut up," Carolina finally said. She kept getting caught just watching these conversations take place out of sheer fascination, like one would have with a car crash. "Tucker. What do they bring to the table that we’re missing?"
"A pirate!" Caboose interjected, but quickly shut up with a look from Carolina.
"Well," Tucker said, looking over each of the reds. "Walter knows more than Simmons and is less annoying about it-"
"-Hey!" Simmons interjected.
"Dude, he’s totally right," Grif said with a snicker.
"I drive smarter than Grif-" Tucker continued.
"So does everyone," Simmons muttered.
"-and so do Caboose and Walter. Sarge can fix things too but Lopez is better at it. You know what? Just take Lopez, he’s the least annoying and most skilled out of them."
Silence greeted this as Carolina looked over the red team. That is, until Grif piped in with a confused “you know our names?”
"Of course I do, dipshit, we’ve been teamed up together fighting freelancers and aliens for years," Tucker said impatiently. "Why, don’t you know my name?"
"What? Oh. Oh, sure. Of course I know your name."
"Yeah? What is it?"
"Erm. Well. Church is the guy that Caboose is always looking for and you kinda left for a while-"
"Fuck this. Carolina, can we shoot them yet?"
"If you kill us, Command would just send more reds to take over this base," Sarge said slowly. "Because the glorious red army will not stop in the face of hardship-"
"-since when?-" Grif muttered.
"-and we will continue to fight until every blue realizes the cold, hard truth: we’re better."
"Does he always talk like this?" Carolina whispered to Tucker as Sarge continued on about the integrity of the military and the importance of the chain of command. Simmons listened dutifully which Grif was in a perpetual loop of rolling his eyes. Carolina suspected that Lopez had merely turned off his ears for the time being. Tucker nodded. "I’m not going to kill you," she finally said, once it became obvious that Sarge would not stop unless he was interrupted.
"Oh, fuck," Grif groaned. Somehow he doubted that Carolina would be as forgiving as Sarge is when he doesn’t do any work.
"Your Sergeant is right. Killing you would only draw attention. Instead, you’re now all part of this retrieval mission. Introductory meeting is in two hours sharp."
"Sarge saved us!" Simmons said happily with only the slightest hint of disbelief, and stood up straight in a salute to Carolina.
"I did?" Sarge said uncertainly. "Well, maybe you can still get rid of Grif," he told Carolina optimistically.
"Yeah, we won’t even report his death," Simmons added.
"Fuck you guys," Grif said and turned around to walk back to their base.
So, I’m bad at this. Thanking people as they follow me on tumblr. And holy crap, over the past few weeks my followers practically doubled.
But, seriously guys, thank you. <3 I can only hope my blog remains interesting for you, haha.
I know I’ve mentioned how much I love RoosterTumblr before. But you guys are amazing. Seriously, honestly, amazing. Without going into mushy gushy stuff, I just want to hug every single one of you.
And to the new arrivals that weren’t brought here by my love of Red vs Blue, thank you as well. :) I’m really happy and flattered you find something in my blog that you like, and I really appreciate every one of you.
Ailurophile A cat-lover. Assemblage A gathering. Becoming Attractive. Beleaguer To exhaust with attacks. Brood To think alone. Bucolic In a lovely rural setting. Bungalow A small, cozy cottage. Chatoyant Like a cat’s eye. Comely Attractive. Conflate To blend together. Cynosure A focal point of admiration. Dalliance A brief love affair. Demesne Dominion, territory. Demure Shy and reserved. Denouement The resolution of a mystery. Desuetude Disuse. Desultory Slow, sluggish. Diaphanous Filmy. Dissemble Deceive. Dulcet Sweet, sugary. Ebullience Bubbling enthusiasm. Effervescent Bubbly. Efflorescence Flowering, blooming. Elision Dropping a sound or syllable in a word. Elixir A good potion. Eloquence Beauty and persuasion in speech. Embrocation Rubbing on a lotion. Emollient A softener. Ephemeral Short-lived. Epiphany A sudden revelation. Erstwhile At one time, for a time. Ethereal Gaseous, invisible but detectable. Evanescent Vanishing quickly, lasting a very short time. Evocative Suggestive. Fetching Pretty. Felicity Pleasantness. Forbearance Withholding response to provocation. Fugacious Fleeting. Furtive Shifty, sneaky. Gambol To skip or leap about joyfully. Glamour Beauty. Gossamer The finest piece of thread, a spider’s silk. Halcyon Happy, sunny, care-free. Harbinger Messenger with news of the future. Imbrication Overlapping and forming a regular pattern. Imbroglio An altercation or complicated situation. Imbue To infuse, instill. Incipient Beginning, in an early stage. Ineffable Unutterable, inexpressible. Ingénue A naïve young woman. Inglenook A cozy nook by the hearth. Insouciance Blithe nonchalance. Inure To become jaded. Labyrinthine Twisting and turning. Lagniappe A special kind of gift. Lagoon A small gulf or inlet. Languor Listlessness, inactivity. Lassitude Weariness, listlessness. Leisure Free time. Lilt To move musically or lively. Lissome Slender and graceful. Lithe Slender and flexible. Love Deep affection. Mellifluous Sweet sounding. Moiety One of two equal parts. Mondegreen A slip of the ear. Murmurous Murmuring. Nemesis An unconquerable archenemy. Offing The sea between the horizon and the offshore. Onomatopoeia A word that sounds like its meaning. Opulent Lush, luxuriant. Palimpsest A manuscript written over earlier ones. Panacea A solution for all problems Panoply A complete set. Pastiche An art work combining materials from various sources. Penumbra A half-shadow. Petrichor The smell of earth after rain. Plethora A large quantity. Propinquity An inclination. Pyrrhic Successful with heavy losses. Quintessential Most essential. Ratatouille A spicy French stew. Ravel To knit or unknit. Redolent Fragrant. Riparian By the bank of a stream. Ripple A very small wave. Scintilla A spark or very small thing. Sempiternal Eternal. Seraglio Rich, luxurious oriental palace or harem. Serendipity Finding something nice while looking for something else. Summery Light, delicate or warm and sunny. Sumptuous Lush, luxurious. Surreptitious Secretive, sneaky. Susquehanna A river in Pennsylvania. Susurrous Whispering, hissing. Talisman A good luck charm. Tintinnabulation Tinkling. Umbrella Protection from sun or rain. Untoward Unseemly, inappropriate. Vestigial In trace amounts. Wafture Waving. Wherewithal The means. Woebegone Sorrowful, downcast.
1. NO FANDOM FIGHTS:You are only allowed to start fights with regular prisoners if and only if they bash your fandom(s).
2. We all have one thing in common:gay pairings. Remember this when someone acts up.
3. Gay fanart workshop time is bonding time:Play nice and kindly help others if they ask for it.
4. Sherlock fandom:we would like to ask you to turn your cries off after 11pm. However this rule doesn't apply on Sunday.
5. Doctor Who fandom:We know bananas are high in potassium. Leave it. Also your screwdriver is not sonic and will be confiscated.
6. Supernatural fandom:please do not take all the salt from the cafeteria.
7. Fans are allowed to be in more than one fandom, do not seclude them if they do.
8. Harry Potter fandom:That is not a wand, it is a stick, and it is not allowed indoors.
9. Glee fandom:Those prison guards are not secretly a couple, stop shipping everything.
10. Darren Criss fandom:The furniture is for SITTING/SLEEPING on, not jumping, so please refrain from doing so.
11. Doctor Who fandom:No breaking out, you're not River Song and this isn't Storm Cage
12. AtLA fandom:Zutarans and Kataangers to stop infighting immediately. We're all in this together. Also fake bending battles to be confined to rec time please, you're weirding out the guards.
13. Furnace Fandom:There are no such things as Wheezers, you're scaring the other inmates with your weird stories.
14. Glee fandom:Please stop crafting shivs while glaring menacingly at other shippers after every ship war you guys have. It's getting ridiculous and they're really starting to pile up.
15. Pirates of the Caribbean fans:please do not steal the emergency supply of rum.
16. X-Men First Class fandom:stop destroying all the cleaning buckets, they won't look like that damn helmet anyway
17. Amnesia fandom:You're not in the prison level, there is no need to hide in dark corners and cry for your lantern. You are freaking out your inmates.
18. Hunger Games fandom:No forcing each fandom to select a champion to send in battle against one another.
19. My Little Pony fandom:Love and Tolerate the shit out of EVERYONE.
20. Whedonites:Don't be afraid to like the other prisoners. Joss can't kill them off in here.
21. Batman fandom:Stop stealing the Whovian's lipstick. You are not the Joker.
22. Twilight fandom:Don't pick fights with the Harry Potter fans in the cafeteria. You cannot slay them with sparkles.
23. Wholockians:You can't insist we pray to Moffat during religious services. Your prayers do not appease him or his troll Gatiss.
24. Firefly fandom:Those aren't coats. Those are blankets you've fashioned to look like coats. Stop it! ...It's the middle of winter and we don't have the budget for this.
25. Buffy fandom:No, we aren't going to establish a policy of exposing every staff member and inmate to sunlight on a daily basis 'just to make sure'. And no, you can't all work in the woodshop making 'stakes'. Sorry, those are just wooden shivs.
26. Portal and Stargate Fandoms:Your cellmates do not appreciate the chalk circles you keep drawing on the walls. Besides, for it to work you’d have to have the end of the wormhole be on the outside of the prison. Unless you are just sneaking into the kitchen.
27. Skyrim Fandom:Stop calling people “milk-drinkers”. You don’t even know what that MEANS. Also no-one wants to hear about your knee.
28. White Collar Fandom:Pretty sure the guards are looking out for that escape technique by now. You’re never going to grow a convincing beard anyway.
29. Princess Bride:You are NOT Inigo Montoya, your father is upset that you are in jail, and if you quote this again you should prepare to die.
30. Golden Compass:No one else can see your daemon, so it’s kind of freaking people out that you talk to it so much.
31. Temeraire:The egg you get at breakfast is hard boiled. It will never hatch into a dragon, and hoarding them under your pillow won’t change that. Cut it out, they are starting to smell.
32. Dr. Horrible:Actually, the freeze ray you are making out of matchsticks looks quite cool. You may proceed. But hitting on other people on laundry day is unacceptable.
33. Battlestar Galactica:Just because they’re not in your fandom doesn’t make them Cylons! They would appreciate it if you stopped quizzing them on human emotions.
34. House:It COULD be Lupus. But I think you’re getting the prison doctor, not House, to check it out.
35. Mad Men:Um, no, you can’t act like that because we don’t live in the 60’s anymore. Put out that cigar and stop groping the buxom ladies.
36. Vampire Diaries:Stop trying to kill the Twilight fans. You started the whole romanticizing thing, so it’s partially your fault!
37. Song of Ice and Fire:No matter how much you petition the parole board, they will never transfer you to “the Wall”
38. IT Crowd:After you make the necessary jokes, you really should fix the computer. How else will the fanfiction get written?
39.Tin Tin:Pretending to get drunk on the water is not that funny.
40. Monk:Please share your neurotic tendencies only with those who give permission. Organizing people’s cells when they are out in the yard is likely to get you punched.
41. South Park:Just because his name is Kenny doesn’t give you the right to kill him! Also he is not a cartoon. Put the prisoner down.
42. Slenderfandom:No we are not proxies trying to torment you. Put down that camera and knife right now.
43. M*A*S*H:You are no longer permitted in the arts and crafts room if you keep attempting to preform surgery on the tables.
44. [Prototype]:Stop trying to eat the inmates! You will not gain memories or their appearance by doing so.
45. inFAMOUS:You are no longer allowed near any electrical equipment. We've lost a lot of your type because you kept sticking forks in the sockets trying to gain its energy.
46. Kingdom Hearts:We are not Heartless, we are not Nobodies. Put down that broomstick, it is not a keyblade.
47. Homestuck:You are not allowed near the gray face paint anymore. We will also be forced to remove a certain water holding container if you don't stop trying to have sex over top of them. It is unsanitary.
48. The Last Airbender:Stop snapping our silverware in half. It's not considered metalbending and if you continue, we will be forced to use plastic forks and knives again..
49. Holmestuck:John is not a homosexual, period.
50. Castle Fandom:Don't worry, I'd get you out.
51. Fullmetal Alchemist Fandom:Stop drawing transmutation circles on the floors in chalk. You are not alchemists.
52. Minecraft Fandom:Please refrain from digging up the dirt in the courtyard. It's starting to irritate the guards.
53. Fringe Fandom:Wait, where the fuck is the Fringe fandom? (Meanwhile, Fringe fans are chilling in another universe in an alternate timeline, rewatching season 12384132746946 of Fringe.)
54. Hoot Owls:Please don't eat all of our ice cream sandwiches supply in one night, you can't go to Walmart at 2 in the morning to buy more.
55. Assassin's Creed:Quit climbing shit, the guards will think you're trying to escape and shoot you down.
56. Directioners:Stop laughing at everything and stop shipping everyone.
57. Beliebers:If a Belieber gets in prison, he/she will immediately be executed.
58. Tangled:Stop stealing all the frying pans.
59. Star Wars fandom:We got it. We let the wookie win. Now stop waving your hands about. Your Jedi mind-tricks have no power here.
60. Star Trek fandom:It's worse than that it's physics, Jim. Just because that guard's name is Scotty, does not mean he will "beam you up." No....don't ask him...oh.....
61. Leverage Fandom:Please refrain from stealing from the guards, also please don't punch them, hack into the security system, or try to con guards into letting you out... Evil plotting isn't appreciated either. Also, when we say this prison is breakout proof, it IS breakout proof. Don't try to prove yourselves.
62. Torchwood fandom:His name is Jack. We understand. But he doesn't appreciate you shipping him with everything. He's not immortal and he's never been pregnant.
63. Misfits Fandom:Stop trying to hit the prison guards on the head with paint cans. They did not gain super strength and murderous intentions after being hit by lightning in a mysterious storm, and they are not out to get you. You won't be allowed in the arts and crafts room if this continues.
64. Portal fandom:Stop knocking down the security cameras. She is not watching you and you are only ruining expensive equipment.
65. The Creature Fandom:No you cannot take 'Sp00n' with you. It is just a spoon. Sp00n is a horse. Get it right.
66. Disney fandom:Your hair will never look like that, so quit trying. Not even if you style it with a fork. Also, we know it's hard, but please try to refrain from bursting into spontaneous song while we're trying to sleep. Not every time is time for a sing-a-long.
67. Jak and Daxter Fandom:Yes, you're in prison. No, you're not being experimented on in an attempt to create super soldiers. Even if you were, only the Mar line could survive anyway. Stop screaming bloody murder in your cells; it's scaring the other inmates and the guards.
68. Big Bang Theory fandom:You cannot procreate by eating too much Thai food, so stop making so damn much of it. You have no research capital, so you cannot be Batman. Furthermore, bazinga.
69. Dexter Fandom:No plastic wrap or sheeting allowed.
70. Bones Fandom:You may only talk between one another, as other inmates do not understand your constant scientific words or your social awkwardness.
71. Facade Fandom:Don't ask people to leave if they mention melons.
72. Psych Fandom:Stop stealing pineapples from the cafeteria and hiding them everywhere they are beginning to rot.
73. Stargate Fandom:You cannot unlock you cells by throwing knives at the walls you will be put in solitary, also stop calling the warden Sokar.
74. AFI Fandom:Please stop drinking gasoline. We know you have a fire inside but we'd prefer it if it were figurative. Also, nipple shirts are not acceptable uniforms.
75. Thor fans:You can say 'I do what I want' all you desire, but prison guards are not Thor and you will do as they instruct.
76. Tales of Fandom:Can you not troll each other when it comes to the temperature of coffee?
CT stormed out. She had had enough. The door wouldn’t slam, because it was automatic (and whose idea was that? Weren’t the Freelancers adult? Couldn’t they be trusted to open doors properly?) But she had to leave the room, because Carolina wouldn’t shut up, and Beta and Zeta wouldn’t shut up, translating even Carolina’s irritable mutterings into her pillow into arguments and lists of dictionary definitions, like they had to think or they’d die in the silence.
CT felt like she had to stop thinking or she’d die. Or kill someone. It was the middle of the night! Didn’t anyone around here sleep?
She said something to that effect when she saw York sitting on the couch. He was wearing a baggy, yellow t-shirt and sweatpants, still drinking coffee even though it was who-knows-what-o’clock in the morning. The coffeemaker burbled suspiciously to itself on the table.
I second, third, motion, chair, accept, whatever-the-right-phrase-for-YES PLEASE-is this mention of porn. Just sayin’.
…well in the case. gimme characters/a prompt and i’ll see what i can do. (no promises.)
wash/ai!york! Because I love wash and york. So much. :D
Also, South and 479er. Because please? I love them. Just, anything with them. I’m really bad at writing prompts. I just want to see more fic from you, because I love what I’ve seen so far! (no pressure!)
"It’s my room too," Wash said defensively. He wouldn’t be saying this if this was, say, only the second time this week that York had tried to kick him out. He wouldn’t be saying this if Epsilon had taken a break this afternoon at some point, making Wash talk louder so his voice can drown out the AI’s thoughts. He wouldn’t be saying this if he didn’t need the time to himself, need the time in his room with his thoughts and with his roommate. If he didn’t need the quiet.
York sighed, but not in a tired way. He managed to do it in a sympathetic way, his look and the curve of his lips telling Wash that he understood. “I know, Wash. I know. It’s just, she’s kinda of bad off in there, and I think I can help her.”
Wash almost said it. He could feel the words start to form in his mouth. But who can help me? He closed his mouth and nodded instead, not looking into the room, not seeing the woman who was sitting on York’s bed, eyes closed.
It’s not that she’d ever ask for help. She wouldn’t. The first few weeks she’d just show up and try and pretend like everything was alright, but it would all seem forced. Most of the others couldn’t catch on, she played it well. Sometimes Wash wasn’t even sure if the Director himself knew what she was really going through. The only reason he saw it at all was because York saw it. The only reason York saw it was, well, because York saw everything, in his way.
He remembered when York first confronted her about it. She had denied it and stormed off, not coming back for two weeks. He remembered when she finally did come back, and how quickly he had fled because of how urgently York asked him to. It was before he had Epsilon. Back when he could still be completely understanding.
Now he sat there, outside the door to his own room, being denied entry and taking these news like a spoiled little kid. If he thought it would help his case, Wash seriously considered pouting at York. He wanted to be surrounded by his own things. He wanted familiarity. He wanted his own damn room. “Do you have-do you know where I could go?” he finally asked, reluctantly.
York studied the face of the man in front of him. He sighed again in that understanding way, and looked past Wash at the corridor, trying to find a suitable place.
"I just-I need some quiet, York." Wash muttered helplessly.
"I know, Wash," York said softly. He caught the eye of someone and nodded, and before Wash knew it there was another person standing next to him.
Wash looked at the new arrival. He paused for the slightest moment of hesitation before he followed Maine to his room. York tapped him on the shoulder in gratitude as he walked off in silence and closed the door.
He hadn’t even sat down in a chair yet before Maine went over to his fridge and tapped the side of Wash’s hand with a bottle of whiskey.
"I don’t want to drink," Wash muttered, but upon looking at Maine’s face and the look that little confession got him, took the bottle. He could hear Epsilon’s thoughts begin to get louder and shut his eyes tight as he opened the bottle and took a few big gulps from it. As Epsilon’s voice faded in his mind, he opened his eyes. Maine was standing in front of him, smiling, holding two empty glasses. "Sorry."
Maine put the glasses down and grabbed the bottle out of Wash’s hands, drinking from it too. He handed it back to Wash without another word and walked off to pull up another chair.
They didn’t say anything, merely took turns taking drinks from the bottle. Wash smiled as the alcohol made it increasingly difficult to differentiate his own thoughts from Epsilon’s. It made it increasingly difficult to differentiate thoughts at all. He didn’t even notice the bottle was empty until Maine silently went to get another one.
It didn’t matter that none of his things were next to him. It didn’t matter that Maine was there with him, that he wasn’t alone. It didn’t even matter that he’d been kicked out of his room for the fourth evening in the past week. As he sat back into the chair, passing the bottle to Maine and leaning against the back of the chair with a satisfied smile, he realized that everything he thought he wanted pre-drinking wasn’t even important anymore.
She wondered, sometimes, what made the others sign up for this program.
Sure, they were all in peak physical shape. Best of the best, that’s why they were even on the Director’s radar. They had all heard the sales pitch: join up with Project Freelancer! Serve your species in every way you can! There was even that commercial that kept airing every hour, about what it meant to be human, what it meant to be a soldier. That wasn’t why she joined.
It wasn’t a throwaway radio ad, or a tv commercial. She didn’t suddenly want to join the military after passing a particularly well-done army poster on the street.
It was what she had. It was all she had. Every breath, every step, every action or decision in her life was for the army. Every ounce of her screamed to be the best. To be the best where no one else can, to show herself that she can. To show herself what she’s capable of. The army was everything to her, and when the opportunity presented itself to prove that, she jumped at it.
Sometimes, especially now, she wished she hadn’t.
If she had never made it into this program, she’d never have had to see it fail. She could have avoided seeing the Director fall apart, seeing everything that Project Freelancer stood for go to dust. Bottom line, as he became so fond of looking at the longer the AI branch was active, they’re helping win the war. They were the best. Yet there was so much more than one line. So much more than the outcome, there was every step that had been taken to get there. With every step, she found herself growing more and more distant. Found herself seeking answers to questions she never realized she had. Pushing people away in the process, trying to push the military away along with them. Keep everything at arm’s reach.
Problem was, once she removed the army from herself, she didn’t know what she had left. A strong conviction in right and wrong, and the burden of knowledge after realizing what the prestigious Project Freelancer had turned into.
She wondered why others joined because they were so much more loyal than her. That, or blind, but she didn’t want to think that they couldn’t see it. She wondered if others were also just playing the part, just biding their time until things become clear again. She wondered why they joined because maybe that was the key, the answer to the questions she had. Maybe someone who hadn’t wanted to be a soldier from as long as she could remember could explain it to her, explain why they came here and came to this program. Explain what they think of their status, their accomplishments now, without the haze of war.
Are they still happy they joined?
More than that, should she still be grateful she joined? Should she thank the Director for opening her eyes to this, or hate him for everything he became and he’s made her become?
She didn’t know. She couldn’t answer that herself, not now, not with everything that had happened. Somehow she clung to this hope that one of the other agents had some kind of secret. Some kind of origin story that made all of this make sense, made the behavior of the people she used to think of as friends understandable, even excusable. Some magic conversation where she would stop constantly being unsure of herself, of everything, and be able to grab onto something solid again.
Wash wasn’t much for reading anything beyond what was practical, but in general he was fond of books. They were quiet and solid and all of their letters were always fixed in place; you never saw lines in a book switch places like the lines on the board. As a child he’d spent a decent amount of time in his father’s personal library, reading in old encyclopedias about the geography of distant planets. That, too, had been practicality; from a young age Wash had determined that he’d be leaving Earth behind one way or another.
The Big Bang Theory uses its so-called “geek” characters as the butt of jokes, has only a superficial understanding of their…
I have yet to watch community (sorry Anna) but yeah this is why I can’t stand the big band theory…. It’s just…… Annoying to watch I guess :/
This is extremely true. Big post incoming. (Also, watch Community. Right now.)
BBT was…fun. It started when I was in physics undergrad, and my friends and I thought it hilarious, because we knew people who had those characteristics. We knew theorists and researchers, people who didn’t have many social skills, people who geeked out over Ren Faires and went to ComicCon in costumes. For the first few episodes, we just ignored Penny and all the implications that she brought to the show. We focused that, for once, this incredibly specific niche of geek, us, the physics people, we getting represented in so many accurate ways.
None of us were one particular character, but all of us were all of them. It was great to watch the show and be able to say to your friends “Yeah, there’s a surprising lack of authenticity at Ren Faires/I totally want to go to NYCC next year as Shadowcat/I’ve had that happen before, it was really awkward and eventually I stopped trying to explain the joke to him/her.” And that carried me through liking BBT for two seasons, before I got pissed off that nothing was changing, the characters weren’t developing, and it wasn’t worth my time to watch it anymore.
But throughout all that, I knew that it wasn’t geek culture. It was us, it was physicists that they were targeting and playing up our characteristics until they were comedic, until they could be called “nerds” and “geeks” and looked down upon by “normal” society. It was never geek culture as a whole that the show represented to me, but I know that’s what it represented to other people.
Nowhere was this more obvious than one of the conferences I went to for nuclear physics. We were in Hawaii (hard life, I know), and our hotel had a little boat to take you around the place. My other (all male) undergrad friends and I got on this boat, and a group of older vacationers got on along with us. They noticed our name tags and asked us why were there, my friend answered that we were here for a physics conference. They mentioned BBT and we laughed and said “yeah, kinda like that, we’re physics students and they’re physicists, so..” and one of them turned to me, as the only girl, and asked in all earnest honesty “so, are you Penny?”. My friends and I just sat in stunned silence for a moment before I very clearly and coldly replied with “No.”
I wouldn’t say that incident itself turned me off from the show, but I did stop watching it shortly after. I think it’s because I realized how the outside world takes these shows, how they see them, and I was no longer ok with the message that BBT was sending out. It went from being a cute show that my friends and I can relate to, to being a show where my friends and I are constantly used as jokes.
Community, as the OP pointed out, is much different. Abed and Troy are truly part of geek culture, and I’m completely ok with them representing me. I’d be completely happy if that scenario earlier was played out again and they asked me if I was Troy, or Abed, or Annie or Britta or anyone, really, because the Community characters are real. Developed. I can identify in some significant way with all of them. They’re all the subject of jokes, but it’s the same kind of jokes that every social circle has. No one makes fun of Troy or Abed because they’re geeks. They gently poke fun at them, the way that friends do, because they’re Troy and Abed.
I could write a series about my love for Community. My love for every single character. But the point of this entry is that I agree, Troy and Abed are a much more accurate representation of geek culture as a whole, and I’m thankful that they’re on tv, especially in the face of a show like BBT, or any other show that vilifies geeks as Hollywood sees them.
Six seasons and a movie, guys.
Because we need Troy and Abed. Annie. Shirley. Jeff. Pierce. Yes, even Britta. Because they’re real people.
But there’s a point where anti-social becomes just baffling.
It still puzzles me when I put something I’ve written up on a site like fanfiction.net, someone reviews it, and I respond to the review in a way that encourages further conversation. And then I get nothing back. It just really doesn’t make sense to me.
I guess it’s because when I leave a review, it’s to create a dialogue with the author. I mean, there’s plenty of ways to show my appreciation for a story without reviewing. So if I write something down, if the author manages to find the time and respond to it with something more than a “thanks”, I follow up. So I assume that other people would also jump at the chance.
It’s just odd to me when other writers don’t. And I get not having time, not knowing what to say, but it happens consistently.
I don’t get it.
(Also, tumblr is more or less excluded from this. You guys have been amazing, especially in my recent RvB drabble-thon. I really suddenly felt kinda accepted in this fandom, and it’s really the first time such a thing has happened. And I loved it. Is this a phenomenon unique to RoosterTumblr? Because more people should do this. More fandoms should be like this. Because you guys are awesome. <3)